RIP Susan Joseph

joan_crystal said:

Obituary from last night's Mayor's update 

"Susan B. Joseph, 61, long-time Maplewood resident, passed on April 12, 2020 at the Atrium of Livingston. Susan was born in New York, NY in June 1958. She grew up in a number of towns in New Jersey, and since 1988 enjoyed her time residing in Maplewood.

Susan graduated from Ramapo College in 1989 and from Seton Hall Law School in 1985, attending both at night while working full time. She worked as an attorney for several insurance companies focusing on regulatory matters. Susan had many interests including Yankees baseball, reading, music, photography, theater and politics. She served as a District Leader for the Maplewood County Democratic Committee from 2005-2014, and was active in numerous campaigns. She serviced her community as a member of the Transportation Advisory Committee (1999-2001) and the Affordable Housing board (2007-2010, 2012 – present). Susan was a member of the New Jersey State Bar Association for a number of years, and served as Chair of the Insurance Law Section from 1999-2000. She was a volunteer wish granter for the Starlight Children’s Foundation of New York-New Jersey-Connecticut, from 1988-2009, and granted over 70 wishes to critically, chronically and terminally ill children. She also supported the Community Food Bank of NJ and other organizations.

Susan will be missed."

 Kthnry:  The above is Susan's obituary.  It makes no mention of MOL.

Copihue said:

kthnry, 

It sounds as if you are offended by trying to find out what her MOL name was. 

On the contrary, I would like to know her user name. We've been told that a member of our community has died but we don't know who it is. My point was, if the MOL user name isn't being released, then don't mention that they were a member of MOL and leave us hanging.

I would be happy for the admins to delete these posts so this thread can be used for tributes to Ms. Joseph. But I think I'm raising a valid point.

joan_crystal said:

 Kthnry:  The above is Susan's obituary.  It makes no mention of MOL.

 Your post when you started this thread said she was a long-time MOL member.

As a poster with Susan in her name, let me say that Susan J will be missed, whatever her handle may have been. It is just harder to mourn in abstract.

I respect her privacy, but I also remember how meaningful it was to learned that my late doctor had also been the poster who was so eloquent about the needs of her special needs child.

joan_crystal said:

I just received notification that Susan Joseph, a very active member of our IRL community in Maplewood and long time reader of Maplewood on Line has died.  May she rest in peace and may her memory be for a blessing.  She will live on in my fond memories of her and in the memories of so many others whose lives she touched.  As is the case in these days of imposed isolation, her funeral will be private.

 Long time reader, not poster. Reason why most of you are having difficulty playing Sherlock Holmes. I know Susan. I don’t know her handle on this message board, nor do I want to know. 
let her rest peacefully.

sbenois said:

I once had a long and very interesting conversation with her.  She was very smart and very kind.   And she did post on MOL on occasion.

It's been many years since we spoke - and although I could probably come up with her userid if I tried - she always wanted her privacy and that is the way it should stay.

May she rest in peace.

 
Then if privacy is wanted the person should only be identified by their MOL (not IRL) name.  

So it’s the insiders once again announcing‘ one of ours died but we’re not telling you who...’   Pathetic 

I’ve been on MOL since 2005 any resent this in crowd/out crowd game playing...

If an MOLer dies speak of them as their MOL identity ONLY if privacy is wanted. 

Scully, you misunderstand.  No one knows what her MOL avatar was, so it is not being withheld; it's unknown.

I think that the mystery of her MOL avatar is distracting from the person that she was and who is now gone, so I am checking out.

Becoming acquainted with Susan Joseph and her life, which I never would’ve without this thread, is enough for me without knowing her MOL handle. If she had a presence here that caught my eye in the past, those encounters stand on their own. So I can’t connect what I read then to the woman I’ve read about now? I don’t feel like I’m missing out on anything.

For future reference, unless I post differently between now and then, it is OK to reveal my real name after I'm gone.  (Not that I'm all that anonymous here anyway and I don't even know if anyone cares ... but I wouldn't want anyone to agonize over it either.)  I actually went non-real-name originally because I had teenaged children at the time and didn't want anything I posted here to impact them negatively.

It definitely seems that we should let Susan J's username remain a mystery though.

And I guess I'm privileged because I DO know mrincredible IRL, but I'll never tell. 

I just went back to look at the R.I.P. Author thread and noticed that Copihue started that one by identifying him as Bill Dunsavage. No games.

I read author many, many times, and was delighted. I met Bill once, and was also delighted. In my memory they remain separate. It’s the same for me with Laura Nichols and JustMeLaura. There’s something about writing, versus being, that’s always separate.

One final rebuttal, a gentle scolding, and then I am out of here.  I wrote in the OP that Susan was a reader (MOL term lurker) of MOL to explain why I was writing of her death on this forum and to provide some connection.  If she ever identified herself in print here, I was never able to pick up on it and I knew her pretty well.  Think of her as a frequent visitor to our on line community who may or may not have stayed over on occasion.  Does that make her any less one of us?  Susan, were she to read this thread today would likely be very amused at the cries of "who was she?" but I am not.  You have all had the opportunity to read the official obituary which is posted above.  It describes a vital, engaged individual who made significant contributions to an IRL community she loved.  Even if you don't think you may have met her in person, can't you respect her as an individual and respect her wishes?  Believe me, if she had wanted us to know who she was on-line, had she posted to a recognizable degree, she would have told us. 

As for the comparison with  Author, Bill extended his real life into his virtual one until the two merged into a single entity.  He told us his home address.  He shared the inner workings of his thoughts.  He even mentioned his IRL name in a few places.  We came to know him on line in a way none of us came to know Susan from her participation here.  Please, stop with the complaining and the guessing games.  Let us show Susan the respect she deserves and permit her to rest in peace.

Bill Dunsavage's wife is my friend, and I asked her if I could post a notice of his death.  At first she was reluctant, and then she changed her mind.  I sent her the address of the thread, and she wrote to thank me in behalf of the family who loved reading what Bill had meant to you who had had contact with him.

I used to put my name on this board, so I think that everyone knows it.  When I go, feel free to release my name.

When someone perishes, others may often speak of them having been “taken too soon”.

With considerable consideration of late, speaking from my perspective, at whatever age my demise may occur it must inevitably be considered untimely.

I knew Susan from back in my political days. She liked to laugh.

joan_crystal said:

As for the comparison with  Author, Bill extended his real life into his virtual one until the two merged into a single entity. 

I mentioned author for two reasons: to rebut the idea that Copihue or anyone else was playing games, and to illustrate my own idea that real and online identities don’t really merge — for me — so I don’t need to know.

Oh, and a third reason: I like thinking of Bill and author.

You will find a lovely obituary of Bill Dunsavage online if you go to Holle Funerals. There is a great picture of him and a nice mention of MOL.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AfiXkKJ9T1w