Back when MOL was funny. Whatever happened to mr Zona? Our kids Were in the same grades from Tuscan through Columbia. remember there’s no H in Maplewood. I had the pleasure of meeting Jerry when the Springfield Avenue partnership was started, my wife was on it, also on the coalition on race. It’s been almost 30years! Back when Springfield ave was littered with mechanics and parts stores. And one very good hardware store. Great memories. reading the comments made me laugh out loud.
In loving memory of Gerard W. (Jerry) Ryan Maplewood Township Committee, 1992 - 2003, 2009-2015 Maplewood Mayor, 1998 - 2000
The Township of Maplewood mourns the loss of former Mayor, colleague and friend Jerry W. Ryan.
Township Committeeperson and former Mayor Victor De Luca:
“The bedrock of Jerry’s life was public service. In 1992, after a contentious election and legal fight, Jerry began his service on the Maplewood Township Committee, the youngest person ever to have been elected. Jerry served a total of 19 non-contiguous years on the Township Committee, including 3 years as Mayor from 1998 through 2000, again the youngest person to serve as Maplewood’s Mayor. Jerry also served 23 non-contiguous years on the Maplewood Planning Board, including 5 years as Board Chair, a position in which he was serving at the time of his death.”
“Mayor Ryan will be missed by all who knew him.”
Committeeperson Nancy Adams:
"Jerry was larger than life and whether working with him on township endeavors dating back to the early 90s, playing poker, or grabbing a drink at the Gate after Planning Board meetings his stories were engaging and funny. He was one of the smartest people I've known and I will miss his wit and energy; and am grateful for his countless contributions to Maplewood."
Committee person Greg Lembrich:
“Jerry was always there, gracious and gregarious. He was one of our best. Everyone who enjoys living in Maplewood owes a debt of gratitude to Jerry Ryan, even if they never met him. His soul and his service became woven into the fabric of our community, and our lives here are better because of how he lived his here.”
Committeeperson Dean Dafis:
“The best way to describe Jerry I think is to call him a giant. He was a giant in personality, wit, heart, and service. I hope to honor his tremendous legacy with action - to be strong in conviction and open to collaboration, as he advised. Great mentor, great advice!”
Mayor Frank McGehee:
“Mayor Ryan had a big heart, a contagious laugh, an amazing wit and a great respect for people. .
One of his last public acts is one that I will never forget. In March, to commemorate Women’s History Month, I asked Jerry if he would be able to come to the Township Committee Meeting and read a proclamation which quoted his very own words the night he nominated our first woman Mayor, Ellen Davenport.
He was fighting his illness, but told me he would do his best.
The night of the meeting, Jerry was not present initially. But as the moment of the proclamation approached, Jerry was there. He showed up and read his original words beautifully and from his heart. It was very moving for all who were in the chamber that evening.
That is my last memory of Jerry. The ever present person who embodied the essence of community service, especially to and for his beloved Maplewood. Whatever the ask he was always there.
Jerry you will be missed very deeply, but your incomparable legacy will live on for generations to come”
Funeral bunting will be placed on the pillars of Town Hall beginning tomorrow in memory and tribute to Mayor Ryan.
I'm shocked to hear of Jerry's death, not having known he was battling cancer. I will always remember Jerry for his heartwarming sense of humor. He was able to make jokes about every situation, it seemed. Even when he told me of friction between Maplewood residents and the township committee on which he served, how the residents didn't understand what serving entailed, he was able to make jokes. I think it serves as a model for how to continue in what you think is right even when there is adversity.
My first encounter with Jerry was over email. He was reporting to my department about something that wasn't working right in the computer systems. He coined the word "gefurgled" and in the moment said he would continue using the word. Later that day, I introduced myself to him to investigate the gefurglement. My job was as a system administrator, serving the Research arm of Bell Labs. Jerry was one of my department's clients. He decided that we system administrators deserved special titles of our own, so he called all of us Dude. He consistently greeted us with, "Dude?" When there was a large gathering of system administrators in the hall, he pronounced it a dudefest.
In around 2000, when I learned that Jerry would be playing in a local theater production, I decided to attend. I was living in Edison, NJ. I traveled to Maplewood where the play was. I arrived early and ate dinner alone at Arturo's Osteria, sitting in the window, admiring the picturesque view of Maplewood. I thought to myself that I might one day like to live in Maplewood. That came true a few years later, and I owe some of that inspiration to Jerry.
Jerry liked sharing his funny anecdotes. He said that he had made arrangements to take his sons to a stadium game and for whatever reason, he would not be taking his daughter. So he told his sons that they could all do "guy things." One of his sons said, "Like fart!"
Jerry proclaimed funny things loudly in the halls at Bell Labs. One cold winter day, he walked into my aisle saying loudly, "It's so cold I could break a window with my nipples." My aisle had nice offices with big windows. Jerry proclaimed, "Man, these offices don't suck much."
I owe Jerry gratitude for his help with my advocacy for bicycles. My friend Ellen and I had co-founded the South Orange Maplewood Bicycle Coalition. We wanted the town to pass a Complete Streets resolution to make the town more bike friendly and encouraging. I told him of my idea over a beer at a local bar. His advice to me was (1) better to make a proposal that doesn't cost the town money, which was easy enough, and (2) make it so the committee members think that my proposal is their idea. With that, the town passed the resolution, and South Orange quickly followed suit.
I'm sure I'll have more memories of Jerry as I recall them with colleagues and old neighbors. Jerry was like that.
Tom Reingold
High Falls, NY
Be sure to send this to the email address in the obituary - great stories!!
Greg Lembrich posted a beautiful tribute on Facebook today:
"How good a guy was Jerry Ryan? Jerry was such a good guy that he served as a mentor and a supportive resource to me even when I was running against him. Then, the week after that tough election, he invited my wife Alexandra and me out to dinner on a double date with him and his wife Deborah, where we swapped stories and shared jokes. He offered to be an advisor or sounding board whenever I needed one, and he followed through countless times over the years. Often when I lacked the context to understand a longstanding issue or just needed to vent, Jerry was always there, gracious and gregarious, to buy a round, give me the inside scoop (sometimes sprinkled with a bawdy tale), and help me find my way. When I suffered setbacks, he was always among the first to call or text and offer support and encouragement, even if he was on the other side of the issue. When my wife had surgery, he and Deborah came to our house with enough chicken and sides to last for days and sat with us in friendship.
How much did Jerry Ryan love Maplewood? Jerry served on the Township Committee for nearly 20 years, including 3 years as Mayor, and even more time on the Planning Board. Most of it was thankless, but Jerry cherished the privilege of serving the town he and his family loved. In addition to those thousands of hours of public service, Jerry devoted time to so many community groups and seemed to know everyone in town. Jerry loved serving Maplewood so much that he stayed on the Planning Board, and even served as Chair, for years while fighting a fierce battle with cancer. Even when it was clear that he was suffering, I can recall so many times when he nonetheless showed up at Town Hall and elsewhere to serve, to support others, or to celebrate with his community.
What makes Maplewood such a great community? It's not just our proximity to NYC, or our beautiful parks and architecture, or our vibrant businesses. Plenty of other towns have those things as well. What makes Maplewood special, and always will, is our people. And Jerry was one of our best. Everyone who enjoys living in Maplewood (or has at any point in the last 30 years) owes a debt of gratitude to Jerry Ryan, even if they never met him. His soul and his service became woven into the fabric of our community, and our lives here are better because of how he lived his here.
I had hoped to tell Jerry all of this in person, but his time was shorter than I thought. As a Township, and certainly a Township Committee, in time we will find appropriate ways to honor Jerry's memory and celebrate his life. But today I feel sad at the loss of a colleague and friend. And I think back to Election Night 5 years ago when Jerry said, sincerely, that he hoped I would enjoy serving this town as much as he did. If I could, today I would tell him, "Jerry, I do love it, and it's a great privilege. But the bar you set was really high, and I'm still trying to reach it." Rest in peace Jerry, and love to Deborah, your kids, and your entire family as they mourn your loss."
I first met Jerry and his very young children many years ago. He was in a runoff against Mayoy Grasmere in the early '90s and I was a very green PR guy offering my volunteer help, which he really didn't need with his amazing ability to know the issues, relate them patiently to even those with the most questions, and to move along with a smile and a "thank you for your time" when he got a "sorry I'm a Republican." He was even thin back then (no one ever believes me on this point). We became fast friends and spent many evenings out along with other regulars at local pubs after work, where Jerry would always have the best stories or be imparting some obscure knowledge about running a local government body (note how I differentiate those). He knew and was cordial if not effusively friendly with everyone. If he didn't take to someone it was a rare occasion and only noted in a private sidesplittingly funny comment after they had left the scene. Now that Jerry has left the scene I have nothing but sadness and a wish for peace and condolences for Deborah, his and her families and friends, and all who had the privilege to know him.
He once prophetically said to me--and probably others--that he loved Maplewood so much he would have to be carried out. Alas, too soon, my friend.
I remember that specifically now that you mention it Dave. He said (not a specific quote) he’d only leave Maplewood carried out in a box from Jacob Holle funeral home. So sad.
Getting to know Jerry virtually through MOL, way before I met him in person, was one of the best parts of MOL. In many ways the old MOL community was like a bunch of pen pals. Writing so much, we really got to know each other before we even “knew” each other.
I’ve told Deborah this in person, maybe even Jerry too. I knew both separately and one night saw the two of them walking in town together. They were laughing and smiling as they passed Coda. They had such wonderful chemistry and if you knew either of them separately, you know together they really made sense—both super smart, sarcastic, great senses of humor. I later found out it was their first date. It makes me so sad that Jerry’s life was cut short.
I was told to come take a look at this thread and when I saw who was here, I figured it was relatively safe to wade back in.
I have been struggling a bit about what to say about Jerry because many of you right here in this thread were better and closer friends and much has been said so well and so eloquently, but I realized more should be said and has to be said about him, because more people ought to know and I suppose my links to Jerry were a bit different and longer. I learned when my father died that you can tell a lot about a person by how easy it is to eulogize them -- if you dont have to struggle to think of good things to say or find great stories to tell. My father's eulogy was one of the easiest things Ive ever delivered and I see that in what so many have written already in various places. My Jerry story starts with fathers. Our fathers were sports stars and school leaders at the same high school in Staten Island. His father went on to play pro football...an accident prevented my father from playing minor league baseball.
Jerry's parents were Hall of Fame high school coaches, his father in football, his mother in basketball. If I were a girl, Id want to play for his mother. They both had dynastic teams at their respective schools but what made them legendary was their teams were fundamentally peerless and of high character. So to understand Jerry was to know the influence of his parents. They were beloved and when early on, I would acknowledge knowing his parents' reputation, you saw what one always saw from Jerry that I think was really his benchmark -- Jerry had the deepest pride and love for family -- his parents and siblings, his kids, and of course Deb and her children. He was an unfailing and consistent booster for all of them.
Jerry and I went to high school together, a year apart. When he would mention that to people when we were in conversation, I would tell people that even though he looked much older than me, he was actually a year younger. We were on student council together for a year and I recognized then what I have always said -- Jerry was one of the smartest people I ever knew. He loved being smart too but I cant recall him ever thinking he was a better person because of it and I always found him in conversations to not just be interested but curious to know and understand things. He wanted to wade into the middle of and thick of things. At a Syrian supper club dinner when I sat with two men I could not verbally communicate with because of our language differences but shared a couple of glasses of arak with, while others watched, Jerry sat right down next to me to participate in the experience. It wasn't just about the arak to him. We Staten Island guys like simple pleasures too so he would happily wade into baseball talk too.
Or talk in general. We've established that Jerry loved his family. He also loved a beer (or two?) and he loved a good conversation and yes, a good argument (or two?). There was a night where we talked for many hours at The Gate and I wanted to leave for my short walk home but he said, hang out, Im waiting for Christina (his beloved daughter) to get off her shift and I will give you a ride home. I said to him that by time I get in and out of the car I'd be home already. But he insisted (I believe beer magically appeared soon thereafter when I said yes) so an hour later, I get a 20 second ride home and we sit in the car and poor Christina has to hear stories and conversation for another 45 minutes. I knew the walk home would have been quicker.
We differed on politics. Not beliefs but the love for it. Jerry loved the strategy, the game. I did not. But I also knew that wasnt his endgame. It wasnt politics fantasy camp -- he loved civics. He loved governing. Again as has been well established by many, he loved the community. Whether one agreed with his positions on things, that love is indisputable and he did it without impropriety. In fact, perhaps my favorite story was that when he was once accused of impropriety, he gave a response to the accuser that was befitting our Staten Island roots -- blow me! He repeated it too if Im not mistaken so as to be clear.
A sign of age and living in a community a long time is that you see people leave sooner than you like. Sometimes you drift apart because your kids aren't in school together any longer or you aren't involved in the same things or you are busy with other endeavors. Some folks move after a number of years. Some sadly die well before their time and some of those who have died in recent years were people who have had significant positive impact on the community in some manner (and some in this MOL community within the community) -- Laura, Angelo, Sharon, others come to mind, now Jerry. His consistent level of service when he could have walked away is truly remarkable...it really has been civics over politics. Many of us longer residents sometimes lament about the new wave (just as Im sure some lamented about the wave that brought many of us in) but I really do not see the level and extent of involvement in communities any longer. Many of the newer folks in town dont know who Jerry was or only know the name. This week, I have been telling those in my neighborhood who Jerry Ryan was, both for who he was and what he did. There will not be another Jerry Ryan, that is for certain, and I was fortunate to have had our orbits overlap.
Thanks again to the person who alerted me to this thread. Opening the linked thread too. It all made me laugh and cry. There is no H in Maplewood but there will always be Jerry's influence -- its so unfortunate most folks wont have known it firsthand moving forward.
To Deb, his kids, his family, his closest friends, I am truly sorry -- his presence was truly larger than life, his impact truly significant. To the greater community and world -- Im also sorry for your loss.
thanks Wayne...I hope all is well with you. You of course figure in one of my favorite MOL-Jerry stories. After you and I shared a table and conversation at The Blue Plate Special, Laura thought she would have some fun and post here that I was seen having breakfast and talking with you and that led to a rumor that I was going to run for TC. I got a call that night from Jerry and first thing he said was, "so are you getting divorced?". I said what are you talking about? He said, because people think you are running for TC and I asked them, "is Hank getting divorced? Because he has a pre-nup that says he cant run for office." I assured him all was intact. We both laughed and realized it was Laura having some fun (which she readily confessed to)...but a few days later, Vic stopped me and asked me anyway. My answer was the same.
Back in the Reval Wars of 1999/2000 Jerry had to cast the deciding vote on the question of whether the new assessments should stand or be overturned. In the days and weeks leading up to that vote there were hundreds of people who turned out to Town Hall to protest and it was pretty intense, and often ugly. In order to provide transparency, Jerry did a lot of data analytics and he put a database online so that everyone could easily see comparables on their own block and across the whole town.
In the end, Jerry voted to approve the Reval - and in the process he raised his own taxes by thousands of dollars. He could have easily found an excuse to vote the other way...but Jerry was more concerned about fairness than anything else. I was always struck by his amazing act of courage.
I remember the reval wars. I was doing the walkthrough before i closed on my first home purchase. While I was there a post card was dropped through them mail slot on the door saying my home was worth 125k more than i had not yet paid.
(Nice to see you here, Hank. Please feel free to throw out / recycle / use personally or give away the laptop case I left at your house in 2016, when I used it for some reason to bring wine to your house. You were out of town the next day, but you gave me instructions by phone on how to break into your home, but as my plane was leaving I didn't want to be spotted by suspicious neighbors, then caught and held for questioning. And thank you for that wonderful post about our friend.)
(Nice to see you here, Hank. Please feel free to throw out / recycle / use personally or give away the laptop case I left at your house in 2016, when I used it for some reason to bring wine to your house. You were out of town the next day, but you gave me instructions by phone on how to break into your home, but as my plane was leaving I didn't want to be spotted by suspicious neighbors, then caught and held for questioning. And thank you for that wonderful post about our friend.)
Hi Dave...I hope all is well with you. I think the wine carrier is in the same place I stored it. We drank like champions that night/into early morning!
I was told to come take a look at this thread and when I saw who was here, I figured it was relatively safe to wade back in.
I have been struggling a bit about what to say about Jerry because many of you right here in this thread were better and closer friends and much has been said so well and so eloquently, but I realized more should be said and has to be said about him, because more people ought to know and I suppose my links to Jerry were a bit different and longer. I learned when my father died that you can tell a lot about a person by how easy it is to eulogize them -- if you dont have to struggle to think of good things to say or find great stories to tell. My father's eulogy was one of the easiest things Ive ever delivered and I see that in what so many have written already in various places. My Jerry story starts with fathers. Our fathers were sports stars and school leaders at the same high school in Staten Island. His father went on to play pro football...an accident prevented my father from playing minor league baseball.
Jerry's parents were Hall of Fame high school coaches, his father in football, his mother in basketball. If I were a girl, Id want to play for his mother. They both had dynastic teams at their respective schools but what made them legendary was their teams were fundamentally peerless and of high character. So to understand Jerry was to know the influence of his parents. They were beloved and when early on, I would acknowledge knowing his parents' reputation, you saw what one always saw from Jerry that I think was really his benchmark -- Jerry had the deepest pride and love for family -- his parents and siblings, his kids, and of course Deb and her children. He was an unfailing and consistent booster for all of them.
Jerry and I went to high school together, a year apart. When he would mention that to people when we were in conversation, I would tell people that even though he looked much older than me, he was actually a year younger. We were on student council together for a year and I recognized then what I have always said -- Jerry was one of the smartest people I ever knew. He loved being smart too but I cant recall him ever thinking he was a better person because of it and I always found him in conversations to not just be interested but curious to know and understand things. He wanted to wade into the middle of and thick of things. At a Syrian supper club dinner when I sat with two men I could not verbally communicate with because of our language differences but shared a couple of glasses of arak with, while others watched, Jerry sat right down next to me to participate in the experience. It wasn't just about the arak to him. We Staten Island guys like simple pleasures too so he would happily wade into baseball talk too.
Or talk in general. We've established that Jerry loved his family. He also loved a beer (or two?) and he loved a good conversation and yes, a good argument (or two?). There was a night where we talked for many hours at The Gate and I wanted to leave for my short walk home but he said, hang out, Im waiting for Christina (his beloved daughter) to get off her shift and I will give you a ride home. I said to him that by time I get in and out of the car I'd be home already. But he insisted (I believe beer magically appeared soon thereafter when I said yes) so an hour later, I get a 20 second ride home and we sit in the car and poor Christina has to hear stories and conversation for another 45 minutes. I knew the walk home would have been quicker.
We differed on politics. Not beliefs but the love for it. Jerry loved the strategy, the game. I did not. But I also knew that wasnt his endgame. It wasnt politics fantasy camp -- he loved civics. He loved governing. Again as has been well established by many, he loved the community. Whether one agreed with his positions on things, that love is indisputable and he did it without impropriety. In fact, perhaps my favorite story was that when he was once accused of impropriety, he gave a response to the accuser that was befitting our Staten Island roots -- blow me! He repeated it too if Im not mistaken so as to be clear.
A sign of age and living in a community a long time is that you see people leave sooner than you like. Sometimes you drift apart because your kids aren't in school together any longer or you aren't involved in the same things or you are busy with other endeavors. Some folks move after a number of years. Some sadly die well before their time and some of those who have died in recent years were people who have had significant positive impact on the community in some manner (and some in this MOL community within the community) -- Laura, Angelo, Sharon, others come to mind, now Jerry. His consistent level of service when he could have walked away is truly remarkable...it really has been civics over politics. Many of us longer residents sometimes lament about the new wave (just as Im sure some lamented about the wave that brought many of us in) but I really do not see the level and extent of involvement in communities any longer. Many of the newer folks in town dont know who Jerry was or only know the name. This week, I have been telling those in my neighborhood who Jerry Ryan was, both for who he was and what he did. There will not be another Jerry Ryan, that is for certain, and I was fortunate to have had our orbits overlap.
Thanks again to the person who alerted me to this thread. Opening the linked thread too. It all made me laugh and cry. There is no H in Maplewood but there will always be Jerry's influence -- its so unfortunate most folks wont have known it firsthand moving forward.
To Deb, his kids, his family, his closest friends, I am truly sorry -- his presence was truly larger than life, his impact truly significant. To the greater community and world -- Im also sorry for your loss.
While Jerry usually wore his giant intellect very casually, I saw it come into semi-serious competitive play in 2005, as one of his teammates during that year's SOMEF Quizbowl fundraiser. I'd like to think he had as much fun as I did...
Back when MOL was funny. Whatever happened to mr Zona? Our kids Were in the same grades from Tuscan through Columbia.
remember there’s no H in Maplewood. I had the pleasure of meeting Jerry when the Springfield Avenue partnership was started, my wife was on it, also on the coalition on race. It’s been almost 30years! Back when Springfield ave was littered with mechanics and parts stores. And one very good hardware store. Great memories.
reading the comments made me laugh out loud.