Spanking children is not punishment, it's a sex act: Very provocative article in Slate archived

OK that is taking things way to far and into the realm of absurdity.

Spanking is ineffective at getting (long term) the desired result and perpetuates a cycle of violence that has effects throughout life.

But this article undermines all the valid issues by going over the top.

I think the more compelling argument is this one, though I would argue that parenting style differs more by class than by race:

http://www.salon.com/2014/09/16/the_racial_parenting_divide_what_adrian_peterson_reveals_about_black_and_white_child_rearing/

The problem with the article is that doesn't take into account other forms of corporal punishment, nor does it take into account the Bible's admonishment to "spare the rod", both of which would weaken the premise of spanking as solely a sexual act. It raises some interesting points about the history of spanking but I think it fails in it's primary goal, partly because of the reasons just stated.

What do you think about the physiological argument she makes?

shoshannah said:

What do you think about the physiological argument she makes?

Things can be dual purpose. Just because spanking is particularly sexual for the author and just because butts can be sexual at times does not mean that spanking is a sex act. The few times I was paddled in junior high school, sex may have been the last thing on my mind. What the teacher was thinking, I do not know.

shoshannah said:

What do you think about the physiological argument she makes?

I think that's just coincidental. Is the implication that people started to choose to inflict punishment via the buttocks because there was subconsciously some sexual component? Based on the below history, also from Slate, I don't think so.

http://www.slate.com/blogs/browbeat/2012/10/05/who_invented_paddling_the_history_of_spanking_people_s_butts_with_paddles_.html

shoshannah said:

Interesting take on the subject. And very well argued. Thought-provoking.

http://www.slate.com/articles/health_and_science/medical_examiner/2014/09/spanking_is_a_sex_act_which_is_why_it_should_not_be_used_for_punishing_children.html

And more than a little disturbing.

There's a difference between a swat on the tush for whatever reason and making a kid take off his pants and smacking the crap out of them with an open hand, switch, or belt. The parent who does the latter is asserting dominance in many ways, and if he/she is getting a sexual thrill out of smacking a child's bare bottom, then there are many more levels of wrong being perpetrated.

The bottom is an area that minimizes the risk of hurting the child and since it is covered the child doesbnot have to wear it as a badge of shame or handle questions.

Mothers spank too and I think they are less likely to be driven by some subconscious sexual drive.

I think one of her points us that it can feel unintentionally sexual to the child and confuse him and shame him.

shoshannah said:

I think one of her points us that it can feel unintentionally sexual to the child and confuse him and shame him.

With the pants down? Yes.

drummerboy said:

The problem with the article is that doesn't take into account other forms of corporal punishment, nor does it take into account the Bible's admonishment to "spare the rod", both of which would weaken the premise of spanking as solely a sexual act. It raises some interesting points about the history of spanking but I think it fails in it's primary goal, partly because of the reasons just stated.

Agreed. But simply:

Sadly, for some people it is difficult to parent different from the way that you were parented.

It's unintelligble from the article whether the author has children of her own, however, it's clear she has a "spanking fetish" and to correlate the *clear sexual* desire for one's husband to spank them with generic spankingof a child is creepy at best and moronic at worst.

I wonder if giving people shots in the butt is a sexual act or if it is because the butt muscle happens to be a good place to administer shots?

We just spent the weekend with a friend and his 3 boys. My husband and I have come to the conclusion that since he had a crappy miserable childhood, he must feel that his kids should also. Just the tone of him speaking to them is harsh when there is no need. The "great" part for these kids is that they are now going to be used as missiles launched against either parent since they are now starting divorce proceedings

Spanking may be erotic for some adults, but I don't think that it is erotic for children. Spanking children is a way for a larger, stronger person to assault someone who is smaller and weaker, in order to impose his or her will upon the smaller person--the child. It is perfectly possible to teach children how to behave correctly without physically assaulting them.

Not that I agree with spanking, but I was spanked on the butt as a child a few times, and I can assure you there were no sexual overtones!!!

nygirl4ever said:

Not that I agree with spanking, but I was spanked on the butt as a child a few times, and I can assure you there were no sexual overtones!!!

Yeah, me too. I don't think my parents got off on it either...

marylago said:

nygirl4ever said:

Not that I agree with spanking, but I was spanked on the butt as a child a few times, and I can assure you there were no sexual overtones!!!

Yeah, me too. I don't think my parents got off on it either...

As most parents will tell their children while administering corporal punishment, "This hurts me more than it hurts you."

tjohn said:

marylago said:

nygirl4ever said:

Not that I agree with spanking, but I was spanked on the butt as a child a few times, and I can assure you there were no sexual overtones!!!

Yeah, me too. I don't think my parents got off on it either...

As most parents will tell their children while administering corporal punishment, "This hurts me more than it hurts you."

No, I don't think they said that either...

tjohn said:

I wonder if giving people shots in the butt is a sexual act or if it is because the butt muscle happens to be a good place to administer shots?

I suppose a chair is a sex toy?

Odd.

And putting diapers on children? That's some seriously kinky stuff - appalling that our society still tolerates it.

Seems obvious to me that the writer of that article really needs a hug.

ridski said:

Seems obvious to me that the writer of that article really needs a hug.

or a good spanking.